Saturday, March 8, 2008

Dreamworld or Fantasy World?

I was supposed to go to Dreamworld (a theme park) with my son for his birthday today. But my lovely family agreed that I should stay at home and write instead. So they've gone off for a celebration, while I sit here at my laptop. And no, I'm not wasting my time blogging when I should be writing a play! (Well only for this second, anyway.) I've written one new scene and am sitting on the deck looking at the rain and thinking.
Thinking about this world that I'm trying to create. The crows are caawing in the gum tree next to the deck and leaves are drifting down with the gusts of wind. It's all a bit surreal, but probably only because I'm in such a surreal world in the play.
The other thing that's bothering me is this tension and friction between being a writer and being a mother. Hmm, no. That's not right. You can be a mother and a writer easily. You give birth to a child and you're a mother. The difficulty is trying to be a good mother and a writer. Not going to Dreamworld feels like a terrible thing to have done. Specially now that it's raining and I'm imagining Peter and the three boys trying to stay dryish and have fun. I don't think Jack will miss me - he'll be having much too much fun with his friends - but Peter could do with my help and some adult conversation. He carries a heavy load when I'm unavailable for parenting because I'm trying to meet a deadline.
And that puts an added burden on me - because if I'm neglecting my family then it had better be for a good reason. I'd better be writing a shit-hot play to justify the time that I'm away from them.
And, on that note, I'd better get back to it.
I have to make every second count.

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